As a seasoned veteran of the Match.com scene, I've learned many tough lessons: the over-sharers, the profile pictures from ten years ago, and even the etiquette for a one-night stand (always offer breakfast—I'm old-fashioned like that).
But a new lesson has recently caught my attention: The Login Game. Let me explain.
You're seeing someone and you've hit that awkward in-between zone (dates four through six). You're having fun and you don't want to date anyone else, but neither of you has brought up being exclusive—likely out of fear of making things weird. With this paranoia in full swing, you occasionally log in to Match.com, click on her profile, and see that she was online within the last hour. Hmm.
From here, there are a few options:
The Douche Move: "I saw you've been on Match. What's up? Are you talking to other guys?" This works well for the insecure clowns, but it's not my style.
The Cool Guy Move: "So, um, we're cool and all, but are we cool?" This isn't a terrible approach, but eye contact and tone are key. She'll either know you're asking about your relationship status or assume you're trying to buy weed.
The No Move: Just don't say anything.
I don't have an answer to this one yet...but wait.
What if she's logging on to see if I'm logging on?
Whoa, man. That's deep. Maybe I should see if she's selling that weed after all.
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